Yesterday at work, my one on-site co-worker who knows I am pregnant told me I looked like a balloon. I was mildly horrified but realized she was referring to my upper half, and indeed, I can see where folks may think Santa brought me a boob job (though we insiders know Santa brought me a baby). The rate of growth in this area has been profound, and painful. And, apparently, noticeable. That’s ok, it’s going to be food for Babykins, so I’m good to get that going.
Last night I woke up at 1:30 a.m. starving, to the point of getting up for a bowl of high-protein Special K with organic almond milk. Just me and the cat, standing in the dark kitchen eating. Normally, I would always push through hunger like that. I mean, I’m on a perpetual diet/always pretending to be on a perpetual diet. But, now it’s different. It’s hunger that cannot be staved off with wishful thinking and fantasies of me shopping in the Size 8 section. Now it’s a requirement. Plain and simple.
Babykins is cooking along and is now the size of a single green pea. It’s a hard time right now in that there isn’t any tangible feedback that all is well. Fortunately, I have pregnancy books my mom bought me that tell me it’s normal to worry that the baby is ok, so I feel validated in my concerns. But I still just visualize little Babykins busting out some eyeballs here soon and little flippers that will become paddles that will become hands and trust that he or she knows what they are doing. I mean, I even said at some point that I’d try to just leave him/her alone so they could grow…and I swear I felt a response to the effect of “yes, please, and thank you, lady.” Great, I’m an overbearing mother already (with a fortunate dab of self-awareness).
Logistically, things are gearing up around here! Jill has started in earnest creating a formal office space for herself (and her work papers) in the basement. She went to town on getting the built-in workbench painted, along with the walls. Our electrician is picking up some canned lights for the ceiling and soon the office furniture from upstairs will move down. The whole point is to free up the front bedroom for a nursery! We plan to keep the room blue, as it is now, boy or girl. Because lots of girls like blue, and we are two of those lots of girls. While we may look cliche if it’s a boy. let the record show it was going to be blue no matter what. Outside of that, we haven’t given the decor any thought. Once the room is emptied out, we can start really thinking on it.
For Christmas, we got two baby items – both of which are fabulous. First, Jill got us a very cool, modern baby scrapbook to keep! She ordered the pregnancy pack so we can start immediately adding details and happenings, then it goes on to be a baby book up until age 5 if you want. Sweet. My sister Kate got us a onesie, so great I can’t reveal it’s nature for it could be the outfit donned in the birth annoucement – it’s that good. Truly, it was a major award.
All this said, we haven’t even seen or heard Babykins’ heartbeat yet! Right now we are scheduled for next Wednesday, January 9, to get our first glimpse. I asked if we could go sooner (of course I did). We’ll see. But hopefully then we’ll have a picture and it will feel even more real than it does now! Meanwhile, we already have an initial group appointment and tour scheduled for the close-to-home hospital where we want to deliver, and I’m going to my first prenatal yoga class tonight. I’ve been doing 45-60-minute walks every day and eating is actually going pretty well. For now, we just let Babykins do his/her thing in there, and wait to get a glimpse next week. I really wish I could have a webcam in my uterus to see what is up :).